Just venting

[pawsfoot]

My fiance has been home all week long and I come home from working full time and going to school full time to find the house a mess, him gone somewhere, and the cat had pooped in the tub because he forgot to clean the box. You would think with him being home and doing nothing he could at least clean up some cat poop. I just want to scream at him, but it would do no good because sometimes I think he rode the special bus to school. Well thanks for hearing me complain, I just didn't think cat poop in the tub is what I should come home to.

 

[Nastynotch]

maybe the cat crapped after he left?

 

[wilomn]

If he's not all that bright, are you sure it was left by the cat?

You may want to have second thoughts here.

 

[Nastynotch]

If he's not all that bright, are you sure it was left by the cat?

You may want to have second thoughts here.

haha, and you all thought the stories about my girlfriend were crazy.

 

[brandy101010]

A Man, Clean?! Don't you think your asking a little much? LOL

 

[dragonflyreptiles]

You way want to expand the thought of "What you want to come home to" before it gets to be years of "What the heck am I coming home to".

Just my thought cause, well, been thinking a lot myself.

 

[pawsfoot]

HAHA. It wasn't like I have all the time in the world to do everthing myself. You would think about 10 scoops through the 2 cat boxes wouldn't kill him. Why doesn't he ever think to do soemthing nice for me? I'm always the one who has dinner ready and the one who rubs his back when he has had a hard day. Does he ever ask "can I do something for you?" NO, he doesn't. That woudl be too much. I already think wht the heck am I coming home to. We've lived together for 2 years. It's not like we just moved in or haven't been dating that long. In some states we are probably considered married. I just feel like he doesn't care about the things I do. He is definitely not the romantic type. Oh and Nathan, the cat wouldn't have pooped in the tub if he had cleaned the box before he left, LOL. I do it all the time it's not that hard.

 

[gothra]

Haha, I just remembered a trick that my mum "invented" years ago, and it worked perfectly. My dad is not too messy, but he has a habit of leaving his socks around, sometimes near his shoes and sometimes on the sofa. My mum was sick of picking up his used socks for him, so she implied a new rule in the house...each sock found anywhere outside the laundry basket will be fined $10; and after several penalties (my sister fell for it a couple times too! LOL), no more used socks could be found laying around. :main_evilgrin:

 

[pawsfoot]

HAHA. I actually do the same thing except we have 2 dogs that are sock-o-holics. If it hits the floor its gone and in pieces. So if it was laying in our bedroom floor with the door shut I would just open the door and let them go crazy, bathroom too. His clothes don't lay around anymore. It's just the fact that I work and go to school and then he expects everything else to get done by me. I guess what I'm saying is, help out just a little. Do 1 load of laundry for me or make dinner one night. It doesn't have to be big it can be a chicken patty that was thrown in the microwave on a bun with some cheese and some ketchup. I'm not picky. I just need a little help.

 

[Milwaukee Reptiles]

HAHA. It wasn't like I have all the time in the world to do everthing myself. You would think about 10 scoops through the 2 cat boxes wouldn't kill him. Why doesn't he ever think to do soemthing nice for me? I'm always the one who has dinner ready and the one who rubs his back when he has had a hard day. Does he ever ask "can I do something for you?" NO, he doesn't. That woudl be too much. I already think wht the heck am I coming home to. We've lived together for 2 years. It's not like we just moved in or haven't been dating that long. In some states we are probably considered married. I just feel like he doesn't care about the things I do. He is definitely not the romantic type. Oh and Nathan, the cat wouldn't have pooped in the tub if he had cleaned the box before he left, LOL. I do it all the time it's not that hard.

Sounds like a guy to me. We don't do ANY unnecessary work...ever.

 

[pawsfoot]

Thanks brian it makes me feel so much better to know that even if I tried to find a new one, they would all be as lazy and not helpful.

 

[Nastynotch]

Thanks brian it makes me feel so much better to know that even if I tried to find a new one, they would all be as lazy and not helpful.

heyyy no no no. were not all lazy and crazy
I could come up with some boggling stories about my significant other.
it would make anyone think twice about women.

 

[pawsfoot]

Don't get on me about it, Brian said it first and since he is speaking for his entire gender I just went with it. It's not very often I get to agree with a man about how crappy some men can be. HAHA

 

[dragonflyreptiles]

As muchas I would like to say YES they all suck, they are all full of the stuff that comes out of the posterior region and as a whole they are well useless for all but a few things.

Its just the old saying, all the good ones are married taken.

But they are not all lazy and crazy but Ive been in the same relationship for 11 years, some years are good, some are bad and some are way past shitty. Sometimes Im the lazy, crazy one but yeah most times it the other way around.

Not one day, week, month or year with anyone will be 50/50, you may get 60/40, 90/10 or 100/0.

IMO it all depends on what flaws are you willing to put up with becuase no one is perfect, not even you. He may have a few complaints himself, though Im not sure how he could justify any.

What about the person can you not live without. Thats the real issue, its not who does what (and yes it took me a long time and I have just figured that out myself) but its what do you need from the relationship, what can you live with and without and what can you compromise on. And does he give you any of the things you need, want and compromise on the rest?

 

[pawsfoot]

Wendy you are so right. I know I do crappy things and annoy him most days, but despite my complaining we are actually quite good together. He has never once complained about the random animals that I bring home without asking and when I spend our money on geckos and mealworms he doesn't flinch. He even encourages my craziness by saying when we build a biger house we will dedicate a furnished off basement just to the herps. So I guess he can stick around, lol.

 

[Milwaukee Reptiles]

I guess I shouldn't generalize... I apologize to all the non-lazy, nice guys

 

[dragonflyreptiles]

Vicky, you are a lucky girl!

Even after 11 years I still get flack about the reptiles, dogs, cats, fish, gerbils, mealies, roaches arghhhh and the 1 snake (hope I didn't leave much out lol). But I give him flack about the trash, the yard the well whatever bugs me that day.

Brian, you are one of the few nice guys left out there that do not make us women think about these things, and I bet you are married so as I said most of the good ones are married!

 

[Milwaukee Reptiles]

Brian, you are one of the few nice guys left out there that do not make us women think about these things, and I bet you are married so as I said most of the good ones are married!

I appreciate the comment, but I'm actually not married... but I am in a long-term relationship

Vicky.. he's going to give you an entire finished basement for herps, AND doesn't complain when you bring more home? Damn I wish my girlfriend, friends, parents, hell anyone I know, would be that nice when I bring home another gecko

 

[Wretched]

Sounds like a guy to me. We don't do ANY unnecessary work...ever.

Amen

I probably shouldnt mention that i'm jobless and my fiance is playing sugar mama to me,... and gives -great back massages.

her? 60 hours a week at work makeing $$$$
me? all those hours at home, devided between sleeping, computor, xbox, and my geckos.

Life is good.

Did i mention I'm a slob to her clean freak? I cant for the life of me get her to understand how much her 'need to clean' drives me crazy. i like a little mess, makes me feel like I live here.

Heh, but really, i love her, she gets massages too, i cook her dinner... and breakfast... and feed her snakes. yup, she's vegetarian... and has cornsnakes that are ravenous for little dead miice, go figure.

But seriously? 'TELL HIM' We men really wont get the hint unless you spell it out in plain english. You say 'if i am working and you are not, then you are house boy. Earn your keep.' If that doesnt get through, whay are you with somone obviously takeing advantage. But if you say notihng, no ones fault but your own.

 

[The NY Gecko]

You know what they say, theres your story, theres my story, and somewhere inbetween theres the truth.