MEN!!! LMAO

[BalloonzForU]

One day my housework-challenged husband decided to wash his Sweat - shirt. Seconds after he stepped into the laundry room, he shouted to me, "What setting do I use on the washing machine?"


"It depends," I replied. "What does it say on your shirt?"


He yelled back, " University of Oklahoma "


And they say blondes are dumb...
-----------------------------------------------------------
A couple is lying in bed. The man says,

"I am going to make you the happiest woman in the world."

The woman replies, "I'll miss you..."
-----------------------------------------------------------
"It's just too hot to wear clothes today," Jack says as he stepped out of the shower, "honey, what do you think the neighbors would think if I mowed the lawn like this?"

"Probably that I married you for your money," she replied.
-----------------------------------------------------------
He said -"Shall we try swapping positions tonight?"

She said -"That's a good idea... you stand by the ironing board while I sit on the sofa and fart."
-----------------------------------------------------------
Q: What do you call an intelligent, good looking, sensitive man?

A: A rumor
-----------------------------------------------------------
A man and his wife, now in their 60's, were celebrating their 40th wedding anniversary. On their special day a good fairy came to them and said that because they had been so good that each one of them could have one wish.

The wife wished for a trip around the world with her husband.

Whoosh! Immediately she had airline/cruise tickets in her hands.

The man wished for a female companion 30 years younger...

Whoosh...immediately he turned ninety!!!

Gotta love that fairy!
-----------------------------------------------------------
Dear Lord,

I pray for Wisdom to understand my man; Love to forgive him; And Patience for his moods. Because, Lord, if I pray for Strength, I'll beat him to death.

AMEN -
-----------------------------------------------------------


Q: Why do little boys whine?

A: They are practicing to be men.
-----------------------------------------------------------
Q: What do you call a handcuffed man?

A: Trustworthy.
-----------------------------------------------------------


Q: What does it mean when a man is in your bed gasping for breath and calling your name?

A: You did not hold the pillow down long enough.
---------------------------------------------------------
Q: How do you keep your husband from reading your e-mail?

A: Rename the mail folder "Instruction Manuals"

 

[moosassah]

snicker, snicker thanks

 

[Scott&Nikki]

That is very hurtful. How can you come on here and insult and stereotype like that?? Eh, who am I kidding.... HAHA

 

[leolover2]

Rofl i can't get over the second to last one. That was just to funny!

 

[BalloonzForU]

Believe it or not a MAN sent me those!! lol

 

[ReptileMan27]

Well its the womens job to cook,clean etc.. lol, I can see the big out rage of all the women here. The mans job is to be the intelligent one lol. I actually remember something from social studies class, back god knows when, if a women talked back or something to their husband, they would tie her to a chair and dip her in the middle of a pond lol, why cant it still be that way now lol.

 

[BalloonzForU]

Well its the womens job to cook,clean etc.. lol, I can see the big out rage of all the women here. The mans job is to be the intelligent one lol. I actually remember something from social studies class, back god knows when, if a women talked back or something to their husband, they would tie her to a chair and dip her in the middle of a pond lol, why cant it still be that way now lol.

LOL You'll like this one then. Look up where the term "Rule of Thumb" comes from. The law is still on the books in some states. :main_thumbsdown:

 

[Zbiz]

I believe there is intelligent, good looking, sensitive men out there but i think most women dont give them a chance... at least thats the way it seems in my generation.

 

[ReptileMan27]

LOL You'll like this one then. Look up where the term "Rule of Thumb" comes from. The law is still on the books in some states. :main_thumbsdown:

Nice, got to move their:main_laugh:

 

[BalloonzForU]

Nice, got to move their:main_laugh:

Figured you'd like that.

 

[Scott&Nikki]

I believe there is intelligent, good looking, sensitive men out there but i think most women dont give them a chance... at least thats the way it seems in my generation.

Exactly... and he's right here. HAHA

I can't even tell you how many times Nikki turned me down. Then finally she got some sense and asked me out 3 years ago

 

[KiKi]

felicia you made my day everything there is so true youare fantastic you just got stuck with an idiot, hope you are feeling better

 

[okapi]

I believe there is intelligent, good looking, sensitive men out there but i think most women dont give them a chance... at least thats the way it seems in my generation.

Yes

 

[nevinm]

HEY!!!!! I JUST LEARNED HOW TO USE THE WASHER!!!! IM ATLEAST TRYING!!!!! hahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha. oh and im the one that does all the cooking!!

 

[Nastynotch]

-----------------------------------------------------------
Q: What do you call a handcuffed man?

A: Trustworthy.
-----------------------------------------------------------

This one made Courtney laugh untill she cried.

..... but still having a bit of trouble figuring out the first one. :main_robin:

 

[Sunrise Reptile]

I believe there is intelligent, good looking, sensitive men out there but i think most women dont give them a chance.

Huh? Don't you mean are? Sheesh, don't give Felicia MORE ammo! :main_laugh:

:main_laugh: Laugh it up, ladies! . o O ( Now where are those woman jokes? :main_huh: )

 

[LeosForLess]

-----------------------------------------------------------

Q: What do you call an intelligent, good looking, sensitive man?

A: A rumor
-----------------------------------------------------------

a paul......... duh

 

[BalloonzForU]

LMAO Oh you guys are funny!!!

 

[bittner_344]

ouch felicia, i thought we were cool LOL. wow some of those are actually pretty funny, but definatley not true. HAHAHA

 

[bittner_344]

Two guys and a girl were sitting at a bar talking about their lives.
The one guy said, "I'm a YUPPIE. You know, Young Urban Professional."
The second guy responded, "I'm a DINK. You know, Double Income No Kids."
They then asked the woman, "What are you?"
She replied: "I'm a WIFE. You know, Wash, Iron, laundry Etc."