My mom is Insane -.-

[Olimpia]

My mom is insane. She came up to visit me in college this past weekend and everything seemed fine (besides the fact that she reorganized my fridge, and criticized my cleaning abilities.) But then yesterday I get an e-mail of her "evaluation" of my life, which outlined the following:

1. I can't live with my current roommate anymore. (I used to have two guy roommates, but then one left suddenly late in the semester, so the remaining guy and I had no choice but to move into a two bedroom together. So now it looks like we're married or something lol). Because I live with this guy I have no life and I will become a maruja, something like a lonely old hag. Because suddenly she wants me to leave college married? I don't know.

2. I have to get rid of my dog. She's always hated animals, but now she says that having her is cruel to her (?) and that I should give her away to someone with a farm. As if, having lived in Miami for the last 12 years, I know people with farms... Really. I rather give up a kidney than give away my Mina. Besides, half my social life comes from having a dog (anyone who goes to dog parks and to pet things knows what I mean.) I've met dozens of good friends through our dogs.

3. She doesn't know if she wants to continue paying for my college because she doesn't see "passion" in my studies. As if I enjoyed physics or calculus. I have mathematical dyslexia, for crying out loud, of course I hate half my classes. But I need to get passed them to do more biology, which I love and thrive in.

And other such points. I forwarded the e-mail to my dad and he says not to listen to her, but it only causes me stress when she decides to ponder my life and send me this kind of advise.


Blah. Sorry, just needed to rand about this. Now she's getting my grandparents to also suggest I give up my dog and change my major, and it annoys me greatly.

 

[ILoveGeckos14]

You could strike a deal with her like- how about if i get ______ (<----insert bad grade here)ill pay for the class. I tried that and though I had to pay for a few classes along the way haha my parents at least knew I was trying, so that way if I didn't do well in a class it wasn't for lack of trying. As for the physics and calc, wait til you get to Biochem and Orgo Chem, then she'll really think you have no passion lol. Bio majors are where it's at though, it changes how you view the world around you and sets you up for a variety of jobs. There's also more room to grow and figure out what interests you most in the major vs. a more specific major like marketing, accounting, small business management etc....

That stinks about the getting rid of the dog stuff.....I would just ignore her and go pet my dog. lol What kind of dog is Mina?

Lets look at the bright side, at least your fridge got re-organized...

 

[Mel&Keith]

Welcome to the crazy mom club! When I was 19 my mom called my roommate and told her that I was going to steal everything in the apartment and break the lease. I would never steal! I don't even take toothpicks or mints from restaurants. LOL And I was the only one actually paying the rent.

Eventually it will get better. Try to get the rest of the family to help her understand that you love your major but have a hard time in math. It's not that you don't care and you're really trying. Maybe find a study buddy or tutor just to show her that your really trying.

I had to support myself financially from age 16. The upside was that I my mom never had anything to hold over my head so if she was being crazy I'd tell her to leave me alone. The down side is that I could barely afford to feed myself let alone go to college. If you can find a way to deal with her for a couple more years to finish school, I'd do it! It'll be worth all the headaches.

 

[Olimpia]

You could strike a deal with her like- how about if i get ______ (<----insert bad grade here)ill pay for the class. I tried that and though I had to pay for a few classes along the way haha my parents at least knew I was trying, so that way if I didn't do well in a class it wasn't for lack of trying. As for the physics and calc, wait til you get to Biochem and Orgo Chem, then she'll really think you have no passion lol. Bio majors are where it's at though, it changes how you view the world around you and sets you up for a variety of jobs. There's also more room to grow and figure out what interests you most in the major vs. a more specific major like marketing, accounting, small business management etc....

That stinks about the getting rid of the dog stuff.....I would just ignore her and go pet my dog. lol What kind of dog is Mina?

Lets look at the bright side, at least your fridge got re-organized...

That's not a bad idea haha. But it's weird that my dad completely understands that there are classes that are going to be harder than others while my mom seems to have no clue. One semester I actually had a private tutor that would come over 8-10 hours a week! and I still didn't pass the class. The second time around I did better, but I just have no talent for math lol So it's not from lack of trying, but she still doesn't understand that.

I am going to ignore her lol this dog is leaving over my dead body. She's a Shetland sheepdog, and she's been the best dog I've had yet. She's naturally just well behaved, which is such a fantastic change from the devil terriers we've had in the past lol. And somehow my mom still hates her passionately. But who can say no to this face?? haha

Haha very true.

 

[Olimpia]

Welcome to the crazy mom club! When I was 19 my mom called my roommate and told her that I was going to steal everything in the apartment and break the lease. I would never steal! I don't even take toothpicks or mints from restaurants. LOL And I was the only one actually paying the rent.

Eventually it will get better. Try to get the rest of the family to help her understand that you love your major but have a hard time in math. It's not that you don't care and you're really trying. Maybe find a study buddy or tutor just to show her that your really trying.

I had to support myself financially from age 16. The upside was that I my mom never had anything to hold over my head so if she was being crazy I'd tell her to leave me alone. The down side is that I could barely afford to feed myself let alone go to college. If you can find a way to deal with her for a couple more years to finish school, I'd do it! It'll be worth all the headaches.

Hahaha! Why? Why would she say that to her?

Yea, thankfully my dad is on my side. And since he's the one who brings in the money, her threat to cut me off is a pretty empty one because he would never allow it. But it's more the fact that she can't seem to understand that I (and my sister - this definately runs in the family lol) suck at math, and this is just stuff I have to get through on my way to the more serious biology courses. It stinks that she has no faith in me and that she continues to question my choice of major.

It's funny because usually she's ok. But it's when she starts thinking (as mean as that sounds) that she makes problems up in her head, like how suddenly owning my dog is cruel. And then she talks about them with my grandmother, and they bounce ideas back and forth and suddenly tiny problems are a huuge catastrophy! lol For the most part I just have to ignore her and she'll run out of steam to harass me with.

 

[Mel&Keith]

Like I said, mom is crazy!

Well, I feel your pain. (I'm also dyslexic with numbers!) I think ignoring her whining until you get a chance to prove her wrong by excelling in your chosen career path may be the way to go. LOL

 

[wilomn]

Is it possible your mother has entered that time of life when things change?

You could also try showing up with a guy you know she will disapprove of, tell her you're dating or engaged, then offer to break it off if she lets the rest go.

Or just wait it out and deal with your dad.

Good luck and take notes. Someday you'll laugh at a lot of this.

 

[DarthGekko]

She just loves you. Moms will always be moms.

 

[rawson5084]

you have a beautiful dog... I wouldnt give her a way either.....

 

[Olimpia]

Is it possible your mother has entered that time of life when things change?

You could also try showing up with a guy you know she will disapprove of, tell her you're dating or engaged, then offer to break it off if she lets the rest go.

Or just wait it out and deal with your dad.

Good luck and take notes. Someday you'll laugh at a lot of this.

I do know she's going through stuff with my dad now that my younger sister has gone off to college (looks like a divorce is probably imminent), so she's probably distracting onto my "problems."

Hahaha possibly. I do call her to let her know when I've been on dates, just so she'll leave me alone about the living-with-a-guy-so-I-have-no-social-life thing lol. But she still thinks I'm going to be a lonely hag living with just my dog and geckos.

Thanks!

 

[Olimpia]

you have a beautiful dog... I wouldnt give her a way either.....

Thank you! She's definately not going anywhere, but my mom doesn't like animals so she can't understand why anyone would love one.

 

[Barbel]

Well, I hate to break it to your mom, but it does not matter what your major is, there will always be classes that you don't like. I majored in Art and minored in Spanish, two subjects I absolutely love and enjoy, but there were still about 7 or 8 classes that I had to force myself through, because I just hated them! I also intentionally took all the unappealing classes first, like MATH, to get them over with!
I think that it would be MORE cruel to rehome your dog. Dogs become very attached and bonded with their owners. Some can be heartbroken for the rest of their lives after being removed from the people they love. As long as she is getting proper exercise (which it sounds like) she can thrive just fine in an apartment.
As far as becoming an old hag... You are only 20!!!! You have plenty of time to find someone to share your life with. Tell her that you are not interested in seriously dating right now because you want to focus on your studies; see what she says to that!

 

[ILoveGeckos14]

That's not a bad idea haha. But it's weird that my dad completely understands that there are classes that are going to be harder than others while my mom seems to have no clue. One semester I actually had a private tutor that would come over 8-10 hours a week! and I still didn't pass the class. The second time around I did better, but I just have no talent for math lol So it's not from lack of trying, but she still doesn't understand that.

I am going to ignore her lol this dog is leaving over my dead body. She's a Shetland sheepdog, and she's been the best dog I've had yet. She's naturally just well behaved, which is such a fantastic change from the devil terriers we've had in the past lol. And somehow my mom still hates her passionately. But who can say no to this face?? haha

Haha very true.

There was a point in time that my parents gave me crap about school and not trying hard enough but I just brought home my books and asked for help on some of my homework and they got the point!! My dad was a math major and was like oh man I need to go back to school lol Maybe you should send your mom a few physics problems??

Awww Mina is darling!! I love dogs with blue eyes. That's good she's well behaved because I have heard that sheep herding dogs can be nuts!

 

[Olimpia]

Well, I hate to break it to your mom, but it does not matter what your major is, there will always be classes that you don't like. I majored in Art and minored in Spanish, two subjects I absolutely love and enjoy, but there were still about 7 or 8 classes that I had to force myself through, because I just hated them! I also intentionally took all the unappealing classes first, like MATH, to get them over with!
I think that it would be MORE cruel to rehome your dog. Dogs become very attached and bonded with their owners. Some can be heartbroken for the rest of their lives after being removed from the people they love. As long as she is getting proper exercise (which it sounds like) she can thrive just fine in an apartment.
As far as becoming an old hag... You are only 20!!!! You have plenty of time to find someone to share your life with. Tell her that you are not interested in seriously dating right now because you want to focus on your studies; see what she says to that!

Haha I think she just doesn't remember being in school. It's funny because math dyslexia (discalculia) runs in the women in our family - from our grandmother down to my sister and I - so my mom wasn't any better at it that I am lol. But I don't think she remembers suffering through it herself.

For Mina it definately would be, because she's a super sensitive dog. She doesn't like change if I'm not there to be her "rock." Besides, my mom knows she's a riddiculously happy dog. I don't know why suddenly keeping her is "cruel."

Haha I know. I don't know why suddenly it's an emergency that I leave college married or something.

 

[Olimpia]

There was a point in time that my parents gave me crap about school and not trying hard enough but I just brought home my books and asked for help on some of my homework and they got the point!! My dad was a math major and was like oh man I need to go back to school lol Maybe you should send your mom a few physics problems??

Awww Mina is darling!! I love dogs with blue eyes. That's good she's well behaved because I have heard that sheep herding dogs can be nuts!

Haha The stuff has definately gotten harder, my dad doesn't recognize my homework anymore either. When my mom gives me crap I usually ask her if she'd like to take a look at it, to see if she'd do any better. And she'll come back with a comment that has an undertone of "I know I can't do math, so I'm smarter than you are for knowing my limits" to it lol. Thanks mom.

Thank you Yes, we've been super lucky with her. We'd be crazy to give her up!