My turn

[2bacop]

Look. Before I say ANYTHING else, I want everyone to know something about how I feel about Kelli and this website. I love and admire Kelli more than anyone in this community... and probably more than any of my non-gecko friends. I love her like a sister. She has done more for the gecko community than anyone else has. She has suffered the most horrendous and tragic loss any human being could ever suffer. And yet she rose above it to bring the world the Bell albino, and took the heat for the Enigma... both morphs she, and she alone, put on the map. She started this website community, and was able to purchase a house for herself and family because of her success in her gecko business. I don't even think Kelli has a clue what an incredible person she really is. But, I know!

I have stuck by Kelli, defended her, supported her, and stepped up to the plate when she needed me. That's what I do when I love someone. One of the other things I feel when I love someone is protectiveness. I can't help it, it's the 'mother lion' syndrome I guess. When this particular forum appeared, I was afraid. I was afraid for Kelli, and I was afraid for GeckoForums, and I was afraid for the community. Although I do not own this website, I have given everything I have to support Kelli, this website, and the community. It's not my website, but it is my baby, too. All of you are.

In my opinion (and it's just an opinion), I felt like having this particular forum made me feel afraid that all the hard work over these past 4 years to bring this website to the level of integrity and excellence is has become would be compromised by the "Fight Club". I was also afraid to have my own 'reputation' affected by having this kind of environment associated with it. I wasn't sure that I could support this website feeling the way I did.

I stayed up all night last night, sick. I realized that I wasn't giving Kelli enough trust to make the decisions for her own website. I came to the conclusion that I was being 'holier than thou', and that in reality maybe I even needed a place where I didn't have to be the MOGL.. where I could just be myself even if what I am feeling is anger and frustration. So, I got on the computer this morning feeling like lashing out. Feeling left out. So, if this is truly the forum where we can just be ourselves, I don't need to exercise any more self-control, right?

Well, I will continue to love and support Kelli no matter what. I will also continue to support Kelli in whatever she decides to do... right or wrong. If this particular forum turns out to be a less-than-good idea, I will STILL love and support Kelli. I will NEVER say "I told you so". That's not the kind of friend I am.

So if it appears that I am angry and wanting to pick a fight... well, I am. In all honesty, I think most of the shit on this forum is disrespectful to Kelli, to GeckoForums.net, and to the community. This is MY issue, and unfortunately you all are just going to have to get used to my evil twin that has popped out here in the last day. If you have lost respect for me as a result, then that's YOUR issue... not mine. Only the people who's opinion of me means something to me, matters to me. Like Kelli said in a different post, "If you don't like it, fuck off".

Marcia, I havent been posting too much on the fight club, just because I think its more interesting to read than to get involved, but I couldn't stay away from this one. You have been recieving a lot of flack and although I dont agree with your opinion, you have the right to have one, and the right not to be ganged up on, as I feel you kinda were. This took some gutts and my view of you has changed, I think of you with the upmost respect, and I have to say that I dont usually say that about people I haven't meant in person!! :main_thumbsup:

 

[nevinm]

Nevin, I can understand why it might seem like my last comment was out of spite, but it truly wasn't meant like that. THIS is one of the examples of what I meant: http://www.geckoforums.net/showthread.php?t=40130

Nevin, It sounds like you and I need to have a good heart-felt talk on the phone? I haven't talked to you in a l-o-n-g time, my friend.

ohh no marcia, i promis i wasnt talking about you saying something out of spite. i was just compairing how i felt about the last paragraph to something else. your entire post was soo heart felt and then in the las paragraph what you said it was like someone doing something then appologizes but tells a person its their fault. i just wish you would have stuck with i was up so late thinking about and i am ok with the forum. but its what you added at the end. it was just contradicting. and my dear sweet marcia YES WE DO NEED TO TALK!!! lol

 

[Gregg M]

Alright, enough with the ass kissing I love you shit... Keep that mushy crap in PM... LOL

Marcia, its good to see you unwind and kick back with us childish, rude, vial adults...