Reckoner is gone.

Chewbecca

www.ellaslead.com
Messages
1,772
Location
60 miles south of Chicago
And I am devastated.

We fed, watered, and misted just Sunday night. We feed and do all of that every other day (though I normally peek in daily at all of my geckos) in the cooler months.

She was fine Sunday night. All healthy, vibrant, curious.

Reckoner has always had a rougher go with shedding than my other leos.
That is why I put a coconut hide in her adult enclosure, so that she could scrape herself on it while shedding.

I went to feed her last night, and I noticed that her humid hide and all the other stuff had been shoved forward, and her water bowl was dumped over.
And she was laying on the warm side of her enclosure, with shed on top of her head and on her toes.
But she was dark. She was almost brown. Like a green/brown.
I called my husband over, and he had me run upstairs and put some water in the bathroom sink.

We soaked her for a bit, but she didn't move. She occasionally opened her mouth for air, but her eyes were sunken in.

She was swollen from her left side of her mouth, down through below her jaw, and down her neck. She had a red/purple swollen line from right under jaw down the side of her throat and it went down her neck.


We checked our rack temps, which they were fine at 90-92.

We're pretty sure that in her thrashing from shedding, she was rubbing her head on the inside of the coconut hide and she must've lifted it, and when it came back down, it landed on her head and must've pinned her there.
She managed to get out, but not before the damage was done.:(


I had to type this through tears. I keep going through waves of being ok, then I'll cry. It's so awful.


In my 32 years of life, I've never seen a pet pass. I've had animals that, when I was younger, my parents took to have euthanized due to old age, but I've never had a pet of mine pass before.


I cannot get it out of my head. My poor baby. She's gone. And I cannot do anything about it. I cannot bring her back. I cannot soak her. I cannot take off the shed and make her better.


Even in dying, she gasped for air and TRIED to make it. But she was too far gone by the time we found her. Whatever injury she suffered from, it took her fast. And I cannot help but wonder if I had done something different, if I could have prevented it.
She was suffering, so Ben had to take care of the situation to end the suffering for her. She will be buried. Where, I do not know, but she will be buried.
This has taught me that I'm not great with death. This is so difficult. I loved her so much. She was my sweet gecko. She was calm and curious. I could hold her whenever I wanted, and she'd let me. She was one of the leos I could let other people hold. She was so good.

I will miss her so much.

I want to thank Robin for letting me call and cry to her about all of this. She was a huge help. She told my husband what to do so that he could help end her suffering.

I am just so devastated. And I know these things happen, and it probably won't be the last time it happens, especially since I'll be breeding (which I cannot even THINK about right now).
But I cannot imagine it getting any easier.

This is how I will remember you, Reckoner. I'm so sorry.:(
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From the day kristi brought her to me.
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I'm going to miss you.
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Kristi23

Ghoulish Geckos
Messages
16,180
Location
IL
I'm so sorry Rebecca.:( Like I told you this morning, you can't blame yourself and there is nothing you could have done. Losing a pet is soooo hard and it never gets easier.:( I'll be home later this afternoon if you need anything. We're leaving as soon as Jesse gets out of the shower.
 

Bellalee

New Member
Messages
1,682
Location
Around.
Oh Rebecca... I am so SO so sorry this had to happen to you, I can't even imagine how your feeling I just wanted to let you know I am here for you, and thinking about you.
 

Chewbecca

www.ellaslead.com
Messages
1,772
Location
60 miles south of Chicago
Thanks, guys.

I'm going to clean cages later, and give the rest of my babies some extra love.
I don't know if I'll be around much, or I may post pictures later of my other babies.
It depends on what makes me feel better.

I know I'm being a big baby, but it was just so horrible to see her like that knowing she was so full of life and healthy just the day before.
 

Mel&Keith

Mod Squad Member
Messages
7,180
Location
Pasadena, TX
I'm so sorry, Rebecca. Losing a pet is one of the hardest things on earth to deal with. You'll always have amazing memories and photos of her to think of and look at when you're ready. I always seem to adopt older pets with health problems so I know exactly how devastating losing one of them is but once the pain subsides the good memories take over. It's better to have love and lost than never have loved at all, right? Hang in there!
 

robin

New Member
Messages
12,261
Location
Texas
Rebecca, i am so sorry! Reckoner was beautiful and i know how very special. hang in there hon *hug*
 

DarthGekko

Sin City Gecko
Messages
1,094
Location
Las Vegas NV
I am so sorry to hear of your loss Rebecca. I know how much you care for your animals and losing one is never easy. My heart goes out to you.
 

Chewbecca

www.ellaslead.com
Messages
1,772
Location
60 miles south of Chicago
Thanks, guys.
I'll be ok, it's just this happened around 9 pm-ish last night, and it was so fresh this morning when I posted my thread.
I always knew I tried to take really good care of my geckos, but I never really knew just HOW attached I am to each and everyone of them.
I love them all for different things. They each have their own little personalities.

I'll miss Reckoner terribly.:(
 

OneFootedAce

New Member
Messages
2,173
Location
Toronto, Ontario, Canada
Rebecca, words cannot describe how sorry i am for you! I know how much you love your geckos, and Reckoner especially. she was absolutely amazing. It must suck to go through this so suddenly and out of the blue. I am so so so sorry.
 

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