The Truth In Euthanasia

[JordanAng420]

Truth in Euthanasia
By Dr. Doug Mader
March 22, 2010

This is the last of my ramblings for the season. So, of course, I want to end with a bang! Ok, maybe not a cliffhanger like “Who shot JR?” Not even a mystery like the end of the Sopranos. But, I want to rock the “comments” button with a really hot topic.

Euthanasia.

Last season Euthanasia, Can We Say No? set records for feedback and stirred lots of emotions and discussion. It is a subject that always gets my juices flowing.

I need your opinion about something that I find disturbing. Last week one of my associates had to euthanatize a dog. That in itself, although sad, is a fact of life in veterinary practice. What I found disturbing were the events that led up to and the story around the deed. It went something like this:

A relatively new client had a pet that was sick and brought it in for an exam. My associate evaluated a large (grapefruit size) mass, did a needle aspirate and said it was curable with surgery. The associate then gave the client a quote on the approximate cost of the procedure to remove the large tumor. The client was a bit taken aback by the quote and said he needed to go home and discuss it with his family.

So far, nothing out of the norm for this story. We have all been there.

The next day the client called and scheduled the surgery for the following day. The receptionist went through all the standard pre-operative instructions. The client was receptive and said he would be there first thing in the morning.

He arrived before my associate got in to work. When the receptionist handed him the procedure release forms he said, “I'm not going to have the surgery. I have decided to have Buster put to sleep.”

The receptionist, truly shocked, tried to talk to him. He was quiet but adamant that he had made his decision. The receptionist reluctantly handed him the euthanasia authorization. He signed. He paid. He said what seemed like a tearful goodbye and handed the leash to one of the surgery nurses. He left.

After a moment, he stepped back in and shocked my receptionist with his next statement.

“If my wife calls, tell her that Buster died during surgery” then exited before my receptionist could say anything.

My techs opted not to do anything until the associate in charge of the case arrived. When she did she immediately called the owner. He stated, matter of fact, that he was going to tell his children that Buster had died during surgery and that he expected us to honor his decision. My associate tried to tell him that it would be inappropriate to propagate a lie, especially to children, and she did not feel comfortable with doing it. Perhaps, she suggested, he take Buster to another veterinarian.

The owner then broke down and started to cry, stating that he could not afford the surgery and he did not want his kids to know that, “he was too cheap to get Buster the help he needed.” He felt it would be more natural to explain that Buster had cancer and, even though the doctors tried, he died during surgery. (The implication here is that Dad would be a hero for wanting to fix Buster, not the villain for wanting to put Buster to sleep. The culpability for Buster's death would then fall on the veterinarian that was not able to save him.)
With a heavy heart my associate euthanized the dog.

The wife never called.

* * * * *

The client could not afford the surgery and opted to have his pet put to sleep. I hate to see that, but I understand. What I find hard to grasp is that he told his children that he was going to take the pet in for surgery. Then, he went home and told his children that the pet died during surgery. I feel strongly that parents should be honest with their children about such important subjects and they should not lie about them. How will children learn about life and death, and making responsible decisions?

I also feel that it is essential that children be involved with such significant decision-making regarding their pets. Owning a pet is a HUGE part of growing up and learning lesions about life and death, responsibility and stewardship. When child's pet becomes ill it is imperative that the parents teach the children that they must still care for it, and as hard as a pill to swallow as it is, they must pay for that care. Pets are a lot of fun until they get sick and suddenly cost money. Children must learn that they may need to make sacrifices in order to care for their pets. They MUST learn that pets are not disposable and should not be euthanized simply because it is inconvenient (or it is cheaper to get a new one).

I feel very badly for the children. This “white lie” will scar them forever. They will always be afraid of “anesthesia” if they ever take another pet to the veterinarian - perhaps even to the point of keeping necessary health care from their pets should anesthesia or surgery be necessary.

No matter what the situation is, the veterinarian should never be made the scapegoat.


“What happened to your pet?”
“It died during surgery at the vet's office.”

Comments? Please let me know what you think.

 

[robin]

my folks were always honest with us. i once had a horse who coliced, at that time the procedure to repair the damage that had been done was new. he told me between the travel time to elgin (texas A&M agricultural and large animal "ranch"), from boerne and the cost, he could not afford it and it is not a procedure that is a sure fire fix. we kept her at home our vets did what they could and we ended up having to put her down.

 

[JordanAng420]

That's good you had honest folks. At least you did what you did.

I've heard horror stories. Stories that I don't think I can tell on these forums. And there are so many times when I have to deal with a euthanasia....and the children are there...THEN they start asking questions...

 

[robin]

i do not think it's such a bad thing when children are there as long as they are able to understand it. i understood death from a very young age (i was raised on a ranch). animals had to be put down, things happened. my father would shoot the wild cats because of the possibility of disease and such to out domestic animals but i also got to see the birth side of things. at a very young age i help deliver a horse of course i had to go dig and hole and put the after birth (that's heavy) in it but still, i saw both life and death

 

[PetVet]

I couldn't agree more. I work at an animal clinic as well as see cases similar to this a lot. I know as a child my parents were honest about what was going on with our family dog, even when he got sick and was eventually euthanized. As much as I hated the fact of what happened, it made me want to pursue a career involving animal health even more, where your clients decision will probably have the opposite affect. It is sad really, I feel a little pity for that mans conscience.

 

[JordanAng420]

i do not think it's such a bad thing when children are there as long as they are able to understand it. i understood death from a very young age (i was raised on a ranch). animals had to be put down, things happened. my father would shoot the wild cats because of the possibility of disease and such to out domestic animals but i also got to see the birth side of things. at a very young age i help deliver a horse of course i had to go dig and hole and put the after birth (that's heavy) in it but still, i saw both life and death

True.

But what if you were lied to? What if your parents told you something compleatly different and you never knew, unless you checked into it? Wouldn't you feel betrayed and embarrased? I would imagine either a child OR an adult would have a difficult time with untrustworthy parents for the rest of my life after I figured out the truth. JMO.

 

[robin]

True.

But what if you were lied to? What if your parents told you something compleatly different and you never knew, unless you checked into it? Wouldn't you feel betrayed and embarrased? I would imagine either a child OR an adult would have a difficult time with untrustworthy parents for the rest of my life after I figured out the truth. JMO.

if i found out i would be pissed

here is the thing not with animals but you get the idea.
my dad had a hip transplant, well while on the table he had a heart attack. they told me he had a heart murmur and had to get one of his arteries unplugged or whatever that is. they never told me he had a heart attack. 7 years alter my father slipped and said something about the hearty attack he had one the table. i was so mad! so yeah it if being untruthful and lying. if i found out i would be PISSED

 

[JordanAng420]

Compassion Fatigue

My point exactly. When these kids find out what's really going on, then they're going to be too young to understnd at first, so therefore the "parent" has to make the decision (which usually gives you about 20-30 minutes to spend your last moments. Too young for ANY kid to understand.

And it's NOT fair when the kid starts asking me questions, through choked up tears, why little "so and so" had to pass away.

I think compassion Fatigue is getting to me.

 

[Northstar Herp]

It's funny to me how easy it can be for us to forget what we tell our children about lying, at least what I tell mine-

"Honey, when you lie to me, it gives me a hard time believing anything you say in the future."

It's part of my parenting philosophy never to lie to my kids. Never. About anything. I want my kids to have a rock of truth in me. I'm sure I'm wrong about some stuff, but I'm always good for the truth as best I know it, especially in a world full of media bends to make us buy stuff and movies filled with unrealistic situations.

The dudes decision was selfish, if you ask me. He had a real teachable moment there, and let it go. Working through that kind of thing as a family is a good way to model adult decision making skills and maybe even a discussion on finances and responsibility in pet ownership. Instead there will likely be none of that, just the "oh well, let's go look for another puppy!"

If you ask me, if kids are old enough to ask a question, they are old enough to get a true answer, maybe a graded one, but a true one nonetheless. Anything different is at best misguided protection and at worst flat out selfishness.

There's a lot more to be said on this subject, methinks...

 

[robin]

Sent from my Eris using Tapatalk

 

[robin]

I was 30 years old too

My point exactly. When these kids find out what's really going on, then they're going to be too young to understnd at first, so therefore the "parent" has to make the decision (which usually gives you about 20-30 minutes to spend your last moments. Too young for ANY kid to understand.



And it's NOT fair when the kid starts asking me questions, through choked up tears, why little "so and so" had to pass away.



I think compassion Fatigue is getting to me.

Sent from my Eris using Tapatalk

 

[Bellalee]

Yes it's extrememly unfair to the kids that they were lied to but then I hate these situations that vets are put into. Pets are disposable to many people. And I'm sure other people who work in the veterinary profession probably would agree with me. Euthanasia is the easy way out, out of money, out of dealing with the medicines (insulin for one person), out of dealing with the animal etc.

 

[robin]

Yes it's extrememly unfair to the kids that they were lied to but then I hate these situations that vets are put into. Pets are disposable to many people. And I'm sure other people who work in the veterinary profession probably would agree with me. Euthanasia is the easy way out, out of money, out of dealing with the medicines (insulin for one person), out of dealing with the animal etc.

in out family animals have never been disposable. my father had a 35 year old mare he got as a yearling and we have cats that have gone to 21 years of age. but a lot of people do think pets (anykind) are disposable. someone gets a dog and it pee's on the floor yet they are not willing to work with it, so they give it to someone or send it to the pound.
we have a double merle sheltie. she is deaf. the people who bought (they paid a lot for her) her did not know she was deaf. when they found out she was deaf, they sent her to the pound. we adopted her. we spent time teaching her sign language and simple commands. she is one of the best dogs we have ever had and you may not believe it but she is an excellent watch dog.

some people would have simply put her down.

 

[Northstar Herp]

Yes it's extrememly unfair to the kids that they were lied to but then I hate these situations that vets are put into. Pets are disposable to many people. And I'm sure other people who work in the veterinary profession probably would agree with me. Euthanasia is the easy way out, out of money, out of dealing with the medicines (insulin for one person), out of dealing with the animal etc.

I don't there's a really simple answer to this, and I see your point at the same time. I can't imagine anybody would say that you shouldn't be able to adopt or buy a dog unless you are willing to spend $5k on a surgery next week, but pretty much everybody will find someone else's stopping point offensive between that and "the eyes are goopy, kill it."

And while I think it's pretty lame what the guy did, my sympathies are more with the kids and my problem more with his parenting choices than with the dog. His decision is just one more bad example for his kids, who may grow up to make the same bad choices based on what's easy, except on a grander scale.

The dog, however, probably walked happily into the office wagging it's tail, got lots of ear scratches, felt a prick and hit the road. Sure, it was premature, but it would have died someday. We're just talking about it being earlier, and without the hip problems, blindness and who knows what else associated with gettin' on in dog years.

Let me be clear though, I'd definitely vote for Buster to still be around if I could. Dogs are some of the bestest peoples.

 

[ariana]

the children should have been told.
end of story.
when i was 5 my first dog was ran over. my mother was blunt about it, but caring, her exact words, "he was ran over, he was in pain, we couldnt have saved him, he was put down." (his back, back legs, and neck were broken yet he somehow managed to live through it, we had our vet do a house call and put him down)

 

[Keitone]

When I was young we raised a lot of our own food (lived on a farm). This included meat, beef, pork, and chicken. I've never had a parent lie to me about the death of an animal.

Funny story, When I was in grade school, I was out collecting eggs from the chickens and Henry (rooster) was very protective of his girls. Well, he "caught" me pillaging one day and he was not happy and attacked me. I wasn't hurt or anything like that but it scared the crap out of me. Well the next week we had chicken for dinner, and it was celebrated that we were eating Henry.

Because of my experiences I feel that I have a very healthy perspective on death, and I am able handle deaths of animals or people that are close to me very well.

I have worked several years at pet stores and I have seen sooo many animals returned or brought in because they were bored with them. The worst is when they leave a box of kittens outside over night in the middle of winter with a note declaring how much they care about the animals in said box.... My favorite though is when the parent(s) come in when they child is in school and try to find an animal that looks exactly like the one that died so they don't have to tell their kid(s) that the hamster died. I really wanted to tell them that the death of a pet is a great learning opportunity. If these parents continue to shelter their kids from the subject of death how will they know how to deal with the death of a person or anything close to them.


The last place I worked at had a "hotel" and people would drop their dogs/cats off, go on vacation and never pick them up. We would make several attempts to contact the owners and they would either ignore the calls or just flat out tell us they weren't coming back for them. Most of the time there were health issues involved.

 

[ElapidSVT]

"children...scarred for life"?
is this your opinion, a veternarians opinion or the advice of a clinical psychologist?

how about lying about invisible beings like santa claus, the easter bunny and god? does that also scar children for life?

i'm not a big fan of euthanasia, but i don't know what evidence there is to support your contention that lying to the kids will scar them for life.

 

[robin]

"children...scarred for life"?
is this your opinion, a veternarians opinion or the advice of a clinical psychologist?

how about lying about invisible beings like santa claus, the easter bunny and god? does that also scar children for life?

i'm not a big fan of euthanasia, but i don't know what evidence there is to support your contention that lying to the kids will scar them for life.

so in a round about way are you saying you would tell your child there is no santa, no easter bunny and you put the dog to sleep because you could not afford to take care of it?

 

[T-ReXx]

This sort of pisses me off. I mean, I understand in a sense that the owner didn't want to face his kids with the truth, but in reality I think if he wanted to lie to them he shouldn't have put the blame on the vet. If he and his wife discussed it and decided they wanted to tell the kids a fairy tale about why the dog died that's up to him. But lying to both his kids AND his wife is flat out wrong. The wife is an adult, she should be able to handle the truth and they should discuss the situation as a couple. Thats part of being parents, a partnership.

Working in a vet hospital we come upon the "animal needs expensive procedure but we can't afford it so just put it to sleep" senario far too often. However, there ARE options. Our practice owner refuses to put animals that have obviously curable problems down just because the owner wants it. Case in point: we had a besinji come in with chronic neck pain. Owners wanted a quick fix and after spending minimum amounts on pain meds called back the following week and wanted to put the dog down because he wasn't looking better and "was 12 anyways." Now, 12 isn't particularly old for that breed, and his issue could have been worked through with time and physiotherapy. Long story short, owners didn't want to do anything except euthanize and the doc flat out refused. They left the practice pissed off and personally I'm not really upset over that. We've done plently of free procedures on deserving animals with financially incapable owners and whenever possible we insist on at least applying for pet insurance beforehand. But that being said it also has to do with quality of life. Cancer is iffy, there are no garuntees with it. And in older animals that may be at risk from the surgery itself we will at times agree that euthanasia may be the better option. It sucks, but it's part of reality. It's basically a case-by-case decision, obviously. But as far as lying to the family, I flat out think that's wrong and not something any vet should participate in.

 

[JordanAng420]

This sort of pisses me off. I mean, I understand in a sense that the owner didn't want to face his kids with the truth, but in reality I think if he wanted to lie to them he shouldn't have put the blame on the vet. If he and his wife discussed it and decided they wanted to tell the kids a fairy tale about why the dog died that's up to him. But lying to both his kids AND his wife is flat out wrong. The wife is an adult, she should be able to handle the truth and they should discuss the situation as a couple. Thats part of being parents, a partnership.

Working in a vet hospital we come upon the "animal needs expensive procedure but we can't afford it so just put it to sleep" senario far too often. However, there ARE options. Our practice owner refuses to put animals that have obviously curable problems down just because the owner wants it. Case in point: we had a besinji come in with chronic neck pain. Owners wanted a quick fix and after spending minimum amounts on pain meds called back the following week and wanted to put the dog down because he wasn't looking better and "was 12 anyways." Now, 12 isn't particularly old for that breed, and his issue could have been worked through with time and physiotherapy. Long story short, owners didn't want to do anything except euthanize and the doc flat out refused. They left the practice pissed off and personally I'm not really upset over that. We've done plently of free procedures on deserving animals with financially incapable owners and whenever possible we insist on at least applying for pet insurance beforehand. But that being said it also has to do with quality of life. Cancer is iffy, there are no garuntees with it. And in older animals that may be at risk from the surgery itself we will at times agree that euthanasia may be the better option. It sucks, but it's part of reality. It's basically a case-by-case decision, obviously. But as far as lying to the family, I flat out think that's wrong and not something any vet should participate in.

Very, very well said Ted. You hit the nail right on the head!